When I was in 4th grade there was a girl in my class with a very prominent unibrow. I wondered for a long time whether she knew it was there. I thought, “I’m pretty sure I’d know if I had a unibrow, so why doesn’t she know.” I began to think it was possible that she didn’t know, because I couldn’t come up with any other reasoning for her not to have rid of it. I thought, “If she just doesn’t know, then maybe I have a unibrow, too, and just don’t know.” I went home and took my mom’s razor and pulled it across the space above my nose.

Looking back, I’m pretty sure I never had a unibrow.